I am a dried-up wasteland without you, Lord. I will relearn from you how to soak up all that you are.

Prayer journal October 19, 1990

Planning to share these journal entries as candidly and unedited as possible… I was twenty-six years old at the time of this writing.

October 19, 1990

Dear Lord,

I’m sorry for being a slacker again today. When it comes to being a self-controlled man, I am failing on some fronts. Thank you for being gracious to me and protecting me today. Oh God, I pray that I will not squander these days. I am determined to do business with you.

I can do all things through you, Jesus, according to your word. Right now, I am acting like an out-of-control overeater, undisciplined, and unholy media consumer. The most crucial mistake that I have been making is neglecting my quiet time with you. I’m sorry Lord, please forgive me and empower me to get back at it.

“The central thing about the kingdom of Jesus Christ is a personal relationship to himself, not public usefulness to men.” These are powerful words of warning from Oswald Chambers (October 19 My Utmost for His Highest).

Lord, I will relearn from you how to soak up your peace, truth, all of your fruits, all that you are. I am a dried-up wasteland without you, Lord. I long for that ongoing consciousness of your presence and contact with your word.

Lord, there have been times in my past when I have been so much deeper in my prayer life and my intimacy with you.

I confess my selfish and immature ways to you. Please come and fill me with your Spirit, Father. I offer my body and the parts of my body to you as instruments of righteousness. Take and use me to do your will. I believe you and your word.

TAKE AWAYS:

How would you have coached me as a young man learning to pray in light of this journal entry?

How was God’s Spirit coaching you in your life of prayer as you read about this moment in my journey?